Where I need to be

  

This is my daily inspirational quote from this morning. I fell in love with it at first sight and have been tossing it around with my mind, heart, and God ever since. Noticing and appreciating how when I actively let go and surrender my will, I get to right where I need to be…often surprisingly quickly and with plenty of peace and serenity.  

Does that mean it’s easy? Most of the time, no. Pain, guilt, shame, worry, and conflict free? Nope.

BUT, totally possible and completely worth it. Definitely a life is hard but good thing!

I kept getting caught up on the “almost always” piece, though. I wanted to be able to re-write the quote and take out the “almost”. I think it’s because I’d like to believe I’m always right where I need to be 🙂 

Aha!!! As soon as I got out of my own way, I came to love the “almost”. It leaves room for more:

surrendering 

faith 

grace 

mercy

wisdom

love 

acceptance 

hope

courage 

peace 

serenity

The “almost” means we get forever chances and only need to aim for progress, not perfection.

It really isn’t all about or on me. God’s got this. So thankful for the opportunity to begin knowing and understanding this and the gift of another day to do my part in getting to where I need to be. 

Right now, that’s off to our 3rd annual Hershey Chocolate World visit with Uncle Timmy, Aunt Hannah and Gman. 

Edited on 2.12.16 to add a couple of videos (bummed they are blurry! I uploaded in HD, so I’m not sure why…)

Love  how each of the girls’ personalities comes out in this little clip. Chelsea – the life of the party & totally enjoying engaging any of the characters who will dance with her. Savanna loving the music and dancing, but also very mindful of the little girl who wanted to dance with someone. And, Shianne standing with Mommy just taking it all in.

Chels and Sav finally convinced Shianne to join in. Love that after she took her time to warm up, she was able to enjoy herself. And all 3 of my girls were smiling and dancing AT THE SAME TIME! Still with the friend Savannna made and included. Also this Hershey band impresses me more and more with each visit. 
  

About Kristin Phoenix

daughter turned teacher turned social worker turned wife turned foster parent turned mom When people who don’t know our family story find out that we fostered and adopted the girls, we generally get one of two reactions…”I would have never known. They look just like you!” or “Oh, how beautiful.” Both of these things are 100% true – on the surface. The picture perfect, shiny, pretty surface. But, just below the surface is a whole lot of mess and brokenness. Our girls endured things that I never even read about in my textbooks. Our family endured things that go completely against the 3 philosophies of safety, permanency, and well-being that the child welfare system is in place to protect. When we have the chance to share a little bit more, the response always goes something like “but…how?!…and why?!” I believe in dreaming big. Part of my dream is a child welfare and healthcare system that would have prevented unnecessary trauma for my girls, my family, and our community. The other part is one of redemption and recovery for everyone involved in our story – which is everyone. I now believe part of why our family endured what we did is so that people would hear our story and ask the hard questions of how and why. With sexual abuse, trauma, foster care, and adoption, we never truly know until we find ourselves in a position of not knowing. Because of the nature of our case, I often found myself in a position of not being able to really answer the hows and whys. I reached a point where staying silent was the only option. Now that our adoptions are finalized, it is time for me to break the silence. This blog is me daring to run after my dreams – even when I find myself out of breath (which is mostly every. single. day.) It is stories of how the collective we have lived up to the Phoenix name and are rising from the ashes to burn bright! I also currently write and edit for Social Justice Solutions
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One Response to Where I need to be

  1. Pingback: Where I wanted to go | rising from the ashes to burn bright…

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